A Christian family has special traits that arise from the Christian concept of sacred marriage and the commandments of the Bible to the married couple about how to deal with each other and how to raise their children. 

The Definition of a Christian Family 

The Christian concept is that a family is a small church, for St. Paul says: ―To Philemon, our beloved friend and fellow laborer, and to the church in your house‖ (Philem. 1:2). The family is an arena for experiencing the work of God in uniting the couple and sanctifying their offspring for Jesus Christ, and in radiating His light to those around Him. 

Domains of Family Love 

Christian love is manifest in many domains such as: 

1.  The Family Altar 

The family prays together and reads chapters of the Bible as a means of binding its members together spiritually, so that they may all receive the blessings of the Holy Spirit and the power to overcome every evil. 

Taking Communion Together 

It is when the whole family is gathered around the body and blood of Jesus in the Eucharist that the church – as a community — is best expressed. This is a feature of our Orthodox Church, for not only does it bring the individual into a relationship with God, but it also nurtures the relationship of the group with God: ―In the congregations I will bless the Lord” (Ps.26:12). 

The Spirit of God endows groups with more than it endows individuals. This is why taking Holy Communion together, after repentance and confession is a continuous source of renewal for the family. 

Bringing Problems Before God 

It is important to get our children used to lifting up their hearts to God when they face a problem. Besides the fact that this makes a way for God to intervene in our problems and our hearts ready to cooperate gratefully, we find that this method builds up faith and fellowship so that we turn to God in all circumstances. “Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.” (Ps. 50;15) 

Mutual Understanding 

The pressures of life in our era, whether those exerted on the exhausted husband, the working wife, or the stressed children who have their conflicts and worries about the future, demand that the family stay committed to settling disputes in a spirit of mutual understanding. It is a great crime against the unity of the family and against oneself that a person puts his foot down and acts in a self-centered, stubborn manner without consideration for others. We must learn to be understanding and to let go of our preconceived ideas and to be open to one another. 

Friendly visits 

It is a good idea for the family to pay friendly visits to other Christian families because this strengthens the spirit of love in the Christian community. It also nurtures and renews love among the family members. 

It is important that the wife care for the feelings of her husband‘s family and the husband for the feelings of his wife‘s family. Most of the problems emerge from neglecting those important feelings. The harmony between the two families is a strong support for a Christian family and an important basis for psychologically well-balanced children. 

We warn against interfering in family affairs because such interference frequently causes problems, divisions, and serious disruption. 

A Spirit of Simplicity and Contentment 

One of the most disruptive influences on a family is that of imitation and envy of other families and trying to ‗Keep up with the Jones‘s.‘ However, the Christian soul that the Lord has filled with His grace sings in heavenly peace: “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.” (Ps.23:1) 

It is important to examine oneself on this point and both spouses are responsible for doing so. St. Paul teaches us that, “Godliness with contentment is great gain … And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts which drown men in destruction and perdition.” (1 Tim. 6:6-9). 

A Sound Upbringing 

Parents should realize that the sound upbringing of children in early childhood and succeeding stages is very important. When the parent is at one time tender to his or her children and on many other occasions strict, the child becomes confused. The child does not understand what principles to follow nor what good behavior means. When the father is strict with his adolescent son or daughter while the mother treats the same one with leniency, being ignorant of the nature of that stage and of the father‘s aim, the young person will be confused and neglect his duties. 

There must be an agreement between the parents about how to deal with their children. Affections should be balanced during the process of upbringing.It is important to watch the children‘s behavior with compassionate understanding.This must be done effectively and persuasively so that they become capable of choosing good friends and steer clear of pitfalls. 

The Family and the Community 

Sometimes the parents are very lax with their children; they let them give way to peer pressure. After a while they become mixed up with the wrong kind of company. 

A positive and flexible Christian approach is to be open to people and deal with them in love and cooperation without getting involved in their delinquencies. What is most harmful is being flexible to the point of laxity: letting our values, principles, and kids go adrift. The family should be cautious when it is a matter of getting involved with other families. What some would consider innocent friendships might end up causing critical problems. 

Family and Mass Media 

It is not wrong to have access to different kinds of media at home like TV, radio, newspapers, and magazines, but it is wrong not to help children, and even parents, choose the right thing. All should learn to pick the appropriate method for improving their minds: the right program, a good book, etc. It is up to us to stop and ask ourselves if we are abandoning our children to trivialities or negative influences that will ruin their spiritual lives. 

We hope for the day when the mass media offer material that will build up the spiritual lives of our children, because life is not a decadent play or a violent movie. Indeed, the mass media should elevate — not degrade —people‘s instincts. There are fields of science, art, sports, and even better, religious knowledge that fight atheism and spread the principles of pure, genuine love. These are the themes that we can watch or listen to on the mass media. 

10. Service to Others 

Christ taught us that He came not to be served but “to serve and to give His life a ransom for many” (Mt.20:28). There is no doubt that the spirit of service is the sign of a real Christian soul and the blessed testimony of what Christianity does in people‘s lives. We should become accustomed to serving others and teach our children to do so. 

The selfishness we teach our children will cost us dearly unless we correct ourselves. We ask our children to be selfish and hate even their cousins, to be envious and take advantage of others. All this creates a divided community full of weak and covetous people. Christianity requires self-sacrificial love from us: “Love suffers long and is kind. Love does not envy, love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” (1 Cor.13:4-7) 

Hence, it is necessary to have the spirit of service, to give part of our time, effort, money and talents to others, especially within the church which channels such donations to the needy. Be honest in giving your tithes to the Lord and you will know His blessing. “Bring all the tithes … and prove Me now in this …. If I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you such blessing that there will not be room enough to receive it.” (Mal.3:10) 

WHAT DO WE LEARN FROM THIS LESSON? 

The church trusts that you are going to respond to its appeal for family repentance, that you are going to pray and worship God together, take Communion together, glorify Jesus, and offer active and fruitful service. 

A home is blessed when everyday tasks are accomplished with prayers; “pray without ceasing”. (1Thess. 5:17) 

Father Rueiss  Awad, CONTEMPORARY ISSUES (Toronto, ON: St. George and St. Rueiss Coptic Orthodox Church, 2019).